What’s Inside The Book
(stories with links noted)
A BIG GIG AND A NEW FAN
My band was playing its most important gig and some youngsters were blown away. (LINK)
A STAR IS SWORN
We were all sworn to secrecy before we got there, but when it happened, it made the newspapers.
I was at home recovering from a heart attack and had just taken a sleeping pill when Eddy called from jail needing bail money. So who bailed out who? Or whom? And why?
BIG FISH, SMALL POND
The film studio had a blockbuster film to promote, so they invited everyone in San Francisco media to a free day at a theme park. Bring the kids! Spend the day! Watch a movie! What could go wrong? (LINK)
CLOSE ENCOUNTERS! FILM AT ELEVEN!
My friend and I went to the opening of a new movie and wound up on the evening news, which was fine for me, not so much for him.
I GUESS IT STARTED WITH DELORES
A crazy weekend in New York ended with a frantic chase through Manhattan for an elusive Colombian liquor and the miracle that followed, which led to an off-the-rails radio interview in California later that night. It’s a story of excess and a lot of fun, but probably not for Delores. (LINK)
MODERN TANNING PROCESSES
A mere trifle, this one. I heard that voice, I couldn’t resist, and I’m not sorry. (LINK)
ONCE, WHEN I HAD MYSTIQUE
Everyone secretly wants it but no one knows what it is or how to get it. Me, neither, but one night I had it in spades.
PARTY OF ONE
My pal worked for the Rolling Stones, and I spent a week with them at the legendary Fillmore Auditorium as they rehearsed for their next tour. Yes, the Stones played the Fillmore- for me! (LINK)
RAINBOWS IN THE MIST
Mescaline and Mother Nature together again! No one does it better… (LINK)
TELL ROBIN WILLIAMS I'M SORRY
I loved Robin Williams. Everyone in San Francisco loved Robin Williams. But I think I insulted him and didn’t mean to. Once again, no good deed goes unpunished. This was written before his death, and I left it in the present tense because the sentiment was that I hoped someone would read it and tell Robin what happened, and I wanted to leave in that wishful possibility. So here once again, and for the last time: I’m sorry, Robin. I didn’t mean it that way.
THE BEAUTY OF THE PAGEANT
The legal conjoining of judgment and outright sexism in rural America might sound like it was wrong, but what a job!
Perhaps it could only happen in San Francisco. Okay, also at Burning Man. It starts with a threat, picks up a beat and then evolves into a roar of crazed atonal pounding on heavy metal discards. Sounds crazy, was crazy. Also exhilarating. I doubt you’ve been to one, so read about it here. (LINK)
THE EPIC EMBARRASSMENT
I can’t believe I’m telling you this. If there’s ever a contest of most embarrassing moments, I’m gonna let everyone else go first, because I’m gonna win with this one. It cost me a fortune, it was still the most amazing week of my life, I've still got the really cool jacket, but it ended with this epic, world-wide embarrassment. Yes, I said world-wide. Better me than you, though, right? So I’m getting paid to tell you about it. (LINK)
THE GUEST LIST
It always hurts. This is how I found out I was old.
THE HARVEST FESTIVAL
Modern horticultural revolutionaries take the herb in new directions, then meet and compete in an undisclosed location. It was the first of its kind, it was a convention and a contest. My pal was a judge, I was the emcee, Rolling Stone magazine covered the event and got a picture of me from the elbow down, giving out an award. Yowza. (LINK)
THE LESSON OF SKIN
This is the one that my pal couldn’t read. It’s hard, I’ll grant you, and you don’t have to read it, but I was there and it happened just like this. You might think that reading about it is better than being there. That’s why I’m here.
THE MISSING MUSICOLOGIST
The Tall Ships came to San Francisco; my job was hiring sea chantey-singing groups. There was a lot to look at and explore on the pier that day, but this was what several tourists went home talking about. Sorry, San Francisco. (LINK)
THE MISSING VOICE
What would you call it? Was I in the choir or wasn’t I?
THE PRIVATE CABLE CAR
No one in San Francisco knew you could do this. You couldn’t, but Natalie did it, and we got drunk and shocked some would-be commuters and tourists.
THE TRIP TO BURNING MAN
Surprisingly, the trip there was as much a revelation as the time I spent at this world-famous alternative art event. You probably can’t do this anymore, so read about it here. (LINK)
TO THE STONES!
On a legendary tour in 1975, the Stones were on fire and playing five nights at Madison Square Garden. I was in Manhattan and I wasn’t going. The hell I wasn’t going… (LINK)
TWO LINES ARE BETTER THAN ONE
It didn’t make sense then, it doesn’t make sense now; I guess it’s just how we’re wired.
VISION OF JOHANNA
A lovely lady. I’m still sad. (LINK)
One of these is not like the others, but I wanted you to read it. It’s this one! Soon, everyone you know will know you knew what you know. Yes, that makes sense, and you will have to answer for it, so start thinking up excuses. (LINK)